One of the most challenging aspects of divorce is the effect it has on your children. Even when it is in their best interest, your children will most likely experience a wide range of negative effects after hearing the news.
Fortunately, breaking the news of divorce in the correct manner can mitigate some ill effects on kids. Here are a few things you can do.
Reassure your child
Kids often assume responsibility for their parents’ divorce. They may also believe that the love and affection offered by you and your ex will change. Make sure they understand that this is not the case. Just because you are getting divorced does not mean that your relationship with your child will change. Express that you still love them very much, but you are making this decision to improve their lives and yours.
Answer their questions the best you can
When breaking the news, provide as much information as you possibly can about changing homes and schools. You do not want to reveal major life changes to your child at the last minute, as doing so can compound the trauma they experience. If you lack information, make sure your child understands that and promise to update them as soon as you can.
Provide information concisely
Do not go into too much detail about the reasons behind the split. For example, your children do not need to know whether infidelity played a role. You should also shield them from conflict between you and your spouse, as fights and arguments will only cause more bad feelings. Your child may also feel that they are the reason for the fighting.
While it is impossible to prevent all hurt feelings during divorce, your actions can have a major impact on your children. Most importantly, provide endless love and care to support them during a rough time.